So my first day in the desert is almost completed and this is the only day that I will be posting this week. The rest I will be writing in my personal journal.
Because of work commitments, I haven’t really been able to stick to it as rigidly as set out in the book I am reading, The Law of Light: The secret teachings of Jesus, but that almost doesn’t matter. I am following my own intuition and guidance on the matter and already I am having some pretty profound results. The first thing that I did was to switch the wifi off last night and my quality of sleep was so much more improved and I woke up feeling rested and energised.
I have been easing myself into it gently, as I knew that any drastic change to my diet would cause me to feel unwell. Something which it would then make it difficult to carry out my daily work in a competent manner. I have been eating less over the past week anyway so I am not feeling as hungry and my body isn’t requiring as much food as normal anyway, and this is making the transition easier. I have more or less stuck to the diet. The only thing that I have had that wasn’t probably allowed were rice cakes and humus but I didn’t have many of these and this is only the beginning of the cleanse. And surprisingly, I don’t feel hungry at all and I have so much mental clarity and alertness already, and I feel calmer and lighter.
I have been able to carry out my normal daily work with so much more focus than normal because I haven’t had the temptation to check facebook on my phone every time I have a few spare minutes. Although I have drifted a couple of times into a parallel world lol! Actually, focus at work was becoming a bit of a problem, as it was getting to the stage where I couldn’t focus at all, except for when I was doing visits and this has meant I was getting quite behind with my work and causing me stress. Today seemed quite easy. When it got to 4.30pm though, I was losing focus and ready to switch off for the day. I think that possibly I need to start my day earlier so that I can finish earlier.
Initially, when I finished work, I was tempted to do my usual routine of zoning out on facebook. I did have a quick peek but then switched off. Instead, I did something almost as bad as zoning out on facebook. I started watching videos on youtube about illuminati etc……………….not the best move at all. I was just trying to understand something though. The inversion of this world and the deception and twistedness of it all is unreal. It can make you paranoid and afraid. Who exactly can you trust any more? So I decided to switch off youtube and look at what I was meant to be focusing on today.
The first day of 7 days in the desert asks you to open a circle which you will spend the next few days in and then read the first line of the alternative Lords Prayer ‘Heavenly Source ALAHA/Thou who art everywhere’ and that is the focus of meditation today (or this evening). Then some breathing techniques while saying Aramaic words of I am unconditional love and I am safe. These techniques fill you with the light of unconditional love and provide protection. And at the same time you honour your forefathers and all those who have trodden ‘The Path’ before you. To forgive yourself and those who maybe need forgiveness. Also to set the intention behind your 7 days in the desert out loud. I did all of this and could feel the energies of unconditional love. After a little while of carrying out this breathing technique, I suddenly got a vision of when I was a small child and something my parents did to my brother. I was so angry with them and with the universe. How could they do this! And the tears flowed. And how could I have been born into such a family? I felt anger and shame. The tears flowed for only a short time and then they stopped and after a short time I realised that they were doing their best at that time and that was the only thing they knew what to do, with the knowledge and experience that they had. And I felt some healing of all of that. Not just for me, but for them also.
I then did some meditation, which was deep and I felt so much love for self and everything afterwards. And then did some healing, which ended in the oceans pouring through me and purifying me and I was also purifying them.
The wisdom that I have gained today is that whatever you look for in another person, you will find if you look deep enough. We are mirrors for each other. And the world responds according to how we perceive it and what we observe. A wave changes into a particle when it is observed but because we all see the world in a slightly different way due to our beliefs and expectations then that particle will respond to our beliefs in some way. Usually by illuminating what we are expecting to see. But just because the thing that we are expecting to see is illuminated and looks real, doesn’t mean that it is real. It is easy to make assumptions and judgments based upon what we see by filling in the gaps due to past experiences etc. But that might not be the case and someone might not be behaving in a certain way because of what you believe to be true or things may not be how they seem. How you judge another is how you judge yourself, and vice versa. When you have been traumatised or let down in the past it is a challenge to trust other people. You are constantly on high alert for reasons not to trust them. For that one sign. For those inconsistencies, trying to spot the time when they lie to you and them bam! You were right all along. How can you trust anyone!! They always let you down. The truth is. Or how I am beginning to see it is, that if you look for this then you will always find it because no one is perfect, and things are never as they seem, and so you will always have a self fulfilling prophecy because you are looking for it and they will sense you are looking for it and so they will begin to not trust you and then you have a double whammy! But you need discernment right, or others will just take advantage! Yes and no, I think is the answer to that. As within, so without. So, while ever there is this issue with not trusting others, you will attract people to you who have that tendency to either let others down, or to find it difficult to trust themselves. These people will be presented as an opportunity for both of you to heal. Because ultimately we are one. When we no longer hold this in our energy field, we will no longer attract others with this tendency either, or if there is a commitment, both can be healed together by learning to trust each other and transcending the previous conditioning. It’s so easy to get lost in the mind stuff and the tricks that it plays on us. As long as we take ourselves back to our hearts then we will be ok.
Looking forward to day 2 in the desert!